Hello to All dR members! How are u all? Hope u are all fine! So its time to decide who will be able to participate in next round and who is not, as mention in the title it is judging thread (mainly for judges) in this thread i post the joke i got from contestants with their name, the only thing judges have to do is to give score to each joke out of 10, it means maximum marks judges can give to each contestant is 20 (maximum 10 for each joke), list of users name i will PM to my judges so only thing judges have to do is to write the score of each contestant against their name in the list which i PM to my all three judges,


Here are the jokes:



mightyghost's Joke:

1st Joke On Anna Nicole Smith:

Q: Why was Anna Nicole Smith afraid of taking a paternity test?
A: Anna never scores well on tests!

2nd Joke On David Beckham:

Q: What do David Beckham and British rail trains have in common.
A: They both go in and out of Victoria



Nepali Keta's Joke:

1st Joke:

Rajnikant - Aaj mere Kutte ne anda diya.
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Big B - Kutta kab se anda dene laga?
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Rajnikant - Ye Rajni ka style hai.
Maine apni murgi ka naam kutta rakha hai..... :-P


2nd Joke:

Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.

Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)

Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you?

Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb?

Doctor: Then why are you so happy?

Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!



Insideout Shoots's Joke:

1st Joke:

Salman: America mein WAAR ho gaya boss!!!
Sarukh: U.S mein kyaa rakhaa hai Bloody Fool!!! India mein roz “WAAR” hota hai.


Salman: Wo kaise???

Sarukh: Arre ulloo!!! SOMWAAR, MANGALWAAR, BUDHWAAR…


2nd Joke:

SRk Ki Biwi Bachhe Ki Potty Test Karwane Gayi.
Doctor Bola: “ Ye Potty Nahi Halwa Hai ”
Biwi: “ Hey Bhagwan… Doctor Sahab, Ek Phone Kar Loon? ”
Doctor: “ Kyun ? ”
Biwi: “ Unko Batana Hai Ke Potty Unke Tiffin Mein Chali GayiHai “



dR Chouhan's Joke:

No text Jokes I received from dR Chouhan in the given time limit



∂Я Єяαмιт's Joke:

1st Joke:

KBC With Santa singh…


The Story So Far…


Santa Singh has answered 12 out of the 15 questions correct and has used all his lifelines except for “50-50″ and “Phone a Friend”.


Santa Singh is playing the 13 th Question now which is for 25 Lacs. Let’s see what happens next…


Amitabh Bachchan : Apka 13th question 25 lakh ke liye, yeh raha aapke saamne aapki Computer Screen par…


Santa Singh gets Tense…


Amitabh Bachchan : Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan? Your options are…


Amitabh Bachchan : Toh Santa Singh Jee kya Jawaab hai aapka? [He's quite sure that Santa will opt for option A]


But Santa is surprisingly still confused…


Amitabh Bachchan : Aapke paas abhi bhi do life line baaki hai… 50-50 and phone a friend. Agar aap chahe to unhe use kar sakte hain. Wo aap hi ke liye banaayi gayee hai.


Santa Singh : I think it is A, but I’m not sure.


Amitabh Bachchan : Not sure, Hmmm… Aap kya karna chahenge?


Santa Singh : I would like to use 50-50…


Amitabh Bachchan : Ok Computer Jee, Kripya 2 galat javab mita deejiye…


Computer deletes two names, and leaves the following options:


Now Amitabh Bachchan gets confused and worriedly thinks if the Computer is actually right or has got some bug!. Santa Singh gets all the more Confused after the 50-50 Lifeline…


Santa Singh : I would like to use my last life line too – Phone A Friend…


Amitabh Bachchan : Aap kisse baat karna chahenge??


Santa Singh : Main aapki Misej [Mrs.] Jaya Bachan Ji ko phone karna chahoonga…


Amitabh Bachchan Faints !!! But the Call gets connected to Jaya Bachchan [Thanks to AirTel ]…


Santa Singh : “Jayaji, Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan!?”


receiving reply from JAYA Santa faints..


GUESS WHY????????? ??


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Jaya Bachchan ask’s him ” What are the options?”

2nd Joke:

John Abraham was driving down the street in a sweat because he


had an important meeting and couldn’t find a parking place.


Looking up toward heaven, he said “Lord, take pity on me.


If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the


rest of my life and give up tequila.”


Miraculously, a parking place appeared.


John looked up again and said,


“Never mind. I found one.”



Lucas2321's Joke:

1st Joke:

Q: Do you know 50 Cent's half brother's name?'

A: 25 Cent

2nd Joke:

Taylor Swift waved at a boy last night , he didn't wave back , anyways , she will be having a new album coming out soon


So its time for judges to judge these jokes and give scores in the list which I will give them through PRIVATE MESSAGE!! Then we will decide who will participate in next round! Results will posted as soon as i received judges decision

Hello to All dR members! How are u all? Hope u are all fine! So its time for 2nd Round to start so without being late i m starting second round of the contest. The participants who able to participate in this round are

mightyghost

Nepali Keta

Insideout Shoots

dR Chouhan

∂Я Єяαмιт

Lucas2321

These 6 able to participate in this round!!

Remaining 4 EidenAnderson, BhavinRdx, dR Boss & Moaz333 have to wait for their surprise they get their surprise after result of 2nd round!!

For more info View the result thread of previous round : click here


Now come to talk about 2nd round!!

What the contestants have to do in this round:

Its simple each participant have to private message me TWO jokes before Sunday (16th June 2013) 7 Pm (Indian Time), After it i post judging thread and it will be judge that u able to participate in next round or not, in this round 2 contestants with lower score will be eliminated!!

Topic Of the jokes

In this round each participants have to sent me two jokes, U have to sent me the joke on CELEBRITY either he/she is Bollywood celebrity, TV celebrity or Hollywood celebrity, choice is yours the only thing i want is two jokes on this topic!!


Your both jokes should be written in text no picture jokes allowed

Click Here to View Jokes Of 1st Round

So here is the result thread of 1st round, Results purely based on judges decision!!


On the basis of these results it is very clear that "dR Boss" not able to participate in next round another participant eliminated in this round is "Moaz333"


So now total four participants eliminated from this challenge name of participants are

EidenAnderson

BhavinRdx

dR Boss

Moaz333

But wait users there is special announcement for all four eliminated contestants to stay in touch with contest as they will get a surprise after 2nd round finished!! So Stay in touch with this contest!


Next Round thread (2nd Round Thread) will post Soon!!


to Insideout Shoots for getting highest score in this round

Hello to All dR members! How are u all? Hope u are all fine! So its time to decide who will be able to participate in next round and who is not, as mention in the title it is judging thread (mainly for judges) in this thread i post the joke i got from contestants with their name, the only thing judges have to do is to give score to each joke out of 10, it means maximum marks judges can give to each contestant is 20 (maximum 10 for each joke), list of users name i will PM to my judges so only thing judges have to do is to write the score of each contestant against their name in the list which i PM to my all three judges,


But before joke let me tell my participants and judges about the special power of judges i said in the thread of 1st round (For Participants) that if judges find participants joke are old then they have some special powers of judging their joke, the power judges have for judging their old joke is that if they find any of the joke old they can only give maximum 5 marks (not 10 for old jokes) it means while judging your old jokes, your 10 marks already cut off (5 from each joke) and u can get maximum 10 out of 20 for both jokes so it tottly depends on judges!!


Here are the jokes:



mightyghost's Joke:

1st Joke:

Two men were talking in a bar:
“How did the argument with your wife end yesterday?”
“Ha, she came crawling to me on her knees!”
“And what did she say?”
“You can’t stay under the table forever, coward…!”

2nd Joke:

The boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn’t getting any respect.

The next day, he brought a small sign that

Read:“I’m the Boss!”

He then taped it to his office door.

Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said:

” Your wife called, she wants her sign back!”



Nepali Keta's Joke:

1st Joke:

A man walks into a bar and sees a good-looking woman sitting on a stool. He walks up to her and says, "Hi there, how’s it going?"

She turns to him, looks deep into his eyes and says, "I’ll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place, it doesn’t matter."

He says, "No kidding! I'm a lawyer too. What law firm are you with?"


2nd Joke:

Solution24: Did you see that.....

"No," ABHI says.

"Well, a bald eagle just flew overhead," Solution24 says.

"Oh," says ABHI.

A couple of minutes later, Solution24 says, "Did you see that?"

"See what?" ABHI asks.

"Are you blind? There was a big, black bear walking on that hill, over there." Solution24 says

"Oh." says ABHI

A few minutes later Solution24 says: "Did you see that?"

By now, ABHI is getting aggravated, so he says, "Yes, I did!"

Solution24 says: "Then why did you step in it?"



Moaz333's Joke:

1st Joke:

Jungle mein Santa Banta ke samne sher aa gya
Banta ne sher ki aankhon mein mitti fek ke Santa ko bhagne ko kha
Santa bola mein kyun bhagu, mitti to tune feki hai

Chal Ek Aur

Santa pehli baar date per gya
Girlfriend se bola: mein pehli baar date per aaya hu
koi galti ho jaye to chota bhai samjh ker maaf kar dena

2nd Joke:

Pathan galti se samunder me gir gaya
Doobte doobte uske hath me machli aayi
use pakad kar bahar pheka aur bola Ja tu toh apni jan Bacha Le



Insideout Shoots's Joke:

1st Joke:

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!” The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!”

The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you.”


2nd Joke:

A doctor says to his patient, “I have bad news and worse news”.

“Oh dear, what's the bad news?” asks the patient.

The doctor replies, “You only have 24 hours to live.”

“That's terrible”, said the patient. “How can the news possibly be worse?”

The doctor replies, “I've been trying to contact you since yesterday.”



dR Chouhan's Joke:

1st Joke:

Some scientists decided to do the following experiments on a dog.

For the first experiment, they cut one of the dog's legs off, then they told the dog to walk. The dog got up and walked, so they they learned that a dog could walk with just three legs.

For the second experiment, they cut off a second leg from the dog, then they told the dog once more to walk. The dog was still able to walk with only two legs.

For the third experiment, they cut off yet another leg from the dog and once more they told the dog to walk. However, the dog wasn't able to walk with only one leg.

As a result of these three experiments, the scientists wrote in their final report that the dog had lost it's hearing after having three legs cut off.


2nd Joke:

Biwi (shohar se): Mai ghar chor kar ja rahi hun.
Shohar(ghusse se): Jaan choro.
Biwi: Yeh aap ki Jaan kehne ki aadat bhi naa mujhe hamesha rok leti hai.



dR Boss's Joke:

No text Jokes I received from dR Boss in the given time limit



∂Я Єяαмιт's Joke:

1st Joke:

L.K.G. Student :
your Slate looks very cool bro."
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U.K.G. Student: don't talk nonsense.
This is Samsung Galaxy Note 2 man !!


2nd Joke:

During Breakup -
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GIRL : I got new BOYfriend, he is Smarter, Intelligent and Cuter than you.
So give me my photo Back
GIRLS Rock
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BOY: sent 31 GIRLfriends Photo's and said : I
forgot ur face Darling So please select your
Photo Yourself and Send back the
Remaining.
BOYS Double Rock



Lucas2321's Joke:

1st Joke:

There were 3 boys. One with a hammer, one with a knife, and one with a bomb. The first one got on a plane and accidentally dropped his hammer out of the window. He got off and saw a little boy crying. He asked," Little boy, little boy, why are you crying?" "A hammer fell on my father and now he is unconscious!"

The second one got on a plane and accidentally dropped his knife out the window. He saw a little girl crying. He asked the little girl," Little girl, little girl, why are you crying? "A knife fell on my mother and now she's dead!"

So then the last one gets on a plane. He accidentally dropped his bomb out of the window. He gets off and sees a little boy laughing. He asks the little boy," Little boy, little boy, why are you laughing? "Because my grandmother farted and it blew up the house!"


2nd Joke:

2 men walked into a bar. The first one betted that he could jump from the 20th floor and land safely on the first floor. The other one said," You're on!" So he jumped down and landed on the first floor safely and unharmed. The other one
Asked him," How did you do that?" "With my magic beer!" So the guy ordered one and jumped, fell, and died. Then the bartender said, "You know, superman, you're really mean when you're drunk!



So its time for judges to judge these jokes and give scores in the list which I will give them through PRIVATE MESSAGE!! Then we will decide who will participate in next round! Results will posted as soon as i recived judges decision

Hello to All dR members! How are u all? Hope u are all fine! So its time for 1st Round to start so without being late i m starting first round of the contest. The participants who able to participate in this round are

mightyghost

Nepali Keta

Moaz333

Insideout Shoots

dR Chouhan

dR Boss

∂Я Єяαмιт

Lucas2321

These 8 able to participate in this round!!

Remaining 2 EidenAnderson & BhavinRdx have to wait for their surprise they get their surprise soon!!

For more info View this result thread : click here


Now come to talk about 1st round!!

What the contestants have to do in 1st round:

Its simple each participant have to private message me TWO jokes before Wednesday (12th June 2013) 3 Pm (Indian Time), After it i post judging thread and it will be judge that u able to participate in next round or not, in this round 2 contestants with lower marks will be eliminated!!

Topic Of the jokes

The topic of the jokes is
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About topics of the jokes i decided to give you people free hand this time also you can private message me jokes on any topic you want but remember you have to message me "two" jokes!! and one more thing jokes should be new not old if judges find your joke are old then they have some special powers of judging your joke, the power judges have for judging your old joke will reveal in judging thread!!

Your both jokes should be written in text no picture jokes allowed

Click Here to View Jokes Of Trial Round

So here is the result thread, Results purely based on judges decision


On the basis of these results participants who not able to participate in next round are
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EidenAnderson And BhavinRdx


These two are eliminated from the challenge but there is special announcement for eliminated contestants to stay in touch with contest as they will get a surprise soon!! So Stay in touch with this contest!

And one more thing
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to mightyghost for getting highest score in this round

Next round thread will be posted soon!!